


nothing that's lost is too hard to find

by awoogah123



Series: Red Means Go [7]
Category: Men's Hockey RPF
Genre: Age Difference, Fluff, Getting Back Together, Kissing, Light Angst, M/M, Past Relationship(s), Pining, Secret Relationship, ice hockey, teammates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-03
Updated: 2021-03-03
Packaged: 2021-03-16 16:00:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,195
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29827398
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/awoogah123/pseuds/awoogah123
Summary: “Of course I did,” Craig said earnestly. “I stilldo.And I know it’s a lot to take in, but--”Craig was cut off by Jack’s lips colliding with his, andfuck,he hadn’t realised justhowmuch he’d missed this.
Relationships: Craig Smith/Jack Studnicka
Series: Red Means Go [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2185512
Comments: 2
Kudos: 5





	nothing that's lost is too hard to find

Craig hadn’t anticipated _just_ how shit he would feel when Jack had told him he couldn’t do it anymore, didn’t want to _hide._ Objectively Craig _knew_ Stud was right, knew what he was saying was fair - why should he have to deal with Craig pushing him away constantly? But that didn’t make it any easier to get over. 

Avoiding Jack was kind of impossible, being on the same team and all, that meant Craig’s only option was to be a mature adult about the whole shitty situation. And _that_ was next to impossible seeing as how he felt like a _teenager_ with how much he was pining for his _teammate._ It would’ve been embarrassing if he didn’t think Jack felt the same way, but he’d seen the way Stud stared at him when he thought no one was looking, the way he’d fumble around Craig as if he wasn’t _quite_ sure how to act. 

Craig needed to set things straight, and he needed to do it _now._ Fuck logistics, being logical didn’t make Craig _happy,_ and Craig _really_ wanted to be happy. 

The only problem was trying to get Jack _alone_ \- Jack who avoided Craig as much as their almost _identical_ timetables permitted. If Craig wasn’t feeling so damn _crap_ all the time, he might even be _impressed._

Of course, it was Craig’s fault that he felt so crap, _he_ was the one that had pushed Jack away, the one away that had made it his fucking _mission_ to ensure neither one of them could be happy. 

He was going to change that, and it just so happened that Thursday afternoon after practice was the perfect time for that. Craig liked to think the gods were looking down on him. 

Stud was sat in the front seat of his car, key turning in the ignition, engine spluttering. He wasn’t going anywhere. 

Craig tried not to grin _too_ much as he made his way over to Jack’s car - for one, Jack was _probably_ going to be pretty pissed that his car wasn’t starting, and _also,_ he probably didn’t want anything to do with Craig. However, Craig was never one to give up without a fight. 

Craig tapped on Jack’s window tentatively, grin suddenly gone and replaced with a strange nervousness he’d never felt around Jack before. He fought the urge to turn and run before Jack could spot him. 

Jack spotted him. 

Jack didn’t necessarily look _angry_ as he wound his window down, so Craig counted that as a win, more confused than anything. 

“What do you want?” Jack asked, glancing behind Craig as if he was expecting someone else to be hiding behind him. 

“You look like you could do with some help,” Craig shrugged, knocking his knuckle against the driver’s side door. 

“Secret mechanic?” Jack asked, quirking a brow, and some of the tension subsided. 

“Afraid not,” Craig chuckled, “but _I_ have a car that actually works. I can give you a lift home if you want.” 

Craig held his breath as Jack stared at him, just stared, his mouth clamped shut. Was that a _good_ sign? 

“Why?” Jack finally asked. 

“I’m not just going to _leave_ you here,” Craig said, ignoring the _real_ reason - _I’ve missed you. I’d pretty much do_ anything _to be in your company again._ Craig thought that sounded a little stupid. 

It took a little more persuasion, but Jack eventually agreed, and as he sat in the passenger seat of Craig’s car, the memories came flooding back. Craig couldn’t get their first kiss out of his head - he wished things were that simple now, that he could just go back and do it all over again, _right_ this time. So that he _didn’t_ push Jack away, _didn’t_ hurt him. 

An awkward silence descended on the car; Craig had _so_ much to say, but he couldn’t just say it. He couldn’t just-- 

“I’ve really missed you,” Craig blurted out. Jack’s breath hitched and he turned away from Craig, gaze focused on the streets rolling by as Craig made his way through Boston. 

“ _Craig…_ ” Jack sighed, tone soft yet quiet. Craig couldn’t blame him for being subdued - _annoyed,_ even? - Craig owed him a _lot_ more than a measly _I miss you._

“No, seriously,” Craig continued. “I wanted to apologise, I--” 

“ _Craig,_ ” Jack repeated, a little louder this time. He turned in his seat to face Craig, “This is already hard enough, you don’t have to do this. I don’t want things to be any more awkward between us.” 

“That’s the thing,” Craig sighed, “I don’t want that either. But I _do_ want you to hear me out, _please?_ ” 

“Fine,” Jack sighed, resigned. 

“I messed up,” Craig said, “like _really_ messed up. I was an asshole, I know that, and I know there’s _no_ excuses for how I treated us, our relationship, but I think it’s because I was scared. I was scared of how people would react if they found out, of what would happen - I spent so much time worrying about the _future,_ I didn’t even take any time to think about the present. How happy I was. 

“You made me happy, Jack, _so_ fucking happy. And, I don’t know, I guessed I’d never be able to experience that, _live_ that. _You_ let me live that.” 

Craig paused, glancing sideways at Jack who was staring out of the window, back turned to Craig once again. 

“And I’m not asking you to take me back,” Craig sighed, “I wouldn’t do that. I fully understand that you’re pissed off with me, and _I_ am too. I just wanted to tell you - I _did_ care,” Craig’s voice cracked. “I still do,” he whispered. 

The silence was oppressive as Craig turned onto Jack’s street, _fuck,_ that ride had gone quickly. 

Craig didn’t _know_ what he expected, but he hadn’t expected Jack to just go radio silent on him. He’d prefer to be hit than _this_ \- not that he _wanted_ to be hit either. 

“You said _’relationship’,” Jack said quietly, _so_ quietly that Craig thought he’d imagined it, but then Jack turned to him. Jack’s smile was watery, but it didn’t make him look any less pleased - his brown eyes shone from beneath the tears that had built up. _

_“Yes,” Craig nodded, voice rough. “And I wish I’d done it sooner.”_

_“I didn’t know you felt that way about me,” Jack whispered, and Craig’s heart sunk. Why hadn’t he told Jack this _sooner?_ _

_“Of course I did,” Craig said earnestly. “I still _do._ And I know it’s a lot to take in, but--” _

_Craig was cut off by Jack’s lips colliding with his, and _fuck,_ he hadn’t realised just _how_ much he’d missed this. _

_“I’m so sorry,” Craig whispered, voice muffled against Jack’s lips._

_“I know,” Jack said, pulling away and pecking Craig’s cheek._

_Craig melted in Jack’s touch, he didn’t deserve this - how was Jack _so_ good? _

_“Stop beating yourself up about it,” Jack said, punctuating each word with a kiss. “What matters is what happens now.” He paused, looking up at Craig through his lashes, “Will you come inside with me?”_

_Craig didn’t even have to think about it._

_“Of course I will.”_

**Author's Note:**

> Title is from Everything's Good by The Valla.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this - kudos and comments are appreciated!<3


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